Goodbyes that didn’t happen aka texts I never sent aka I’ll always be your girl.

A hug and a kiss after telling you I’d see you in a month just doesn’t cut it.   This long distance territory we’re slowly creeping towards isn’t something either of us have ever wanted to do. And so I guess we shouldn’t.  You deserve tangible love.  I’m beginning to realize that I do, too.  I constantly fear that rekindling this old twin-flame is holding you back from finding a girl that doesn’t make you lose your mind every goddamn day.  Plus, it’s gonna be cold this winter and you deserve endless cuddles in your freezing ass space heaterless room.   The extensive collection of happy moments and cute memories I’ve been gathering over the past five years (holy shit) isn’t always enough to suppress the massive collection of really fucking brutally shitty times we’ve subjected each other to.   You said it best, we make each other crazy and I’ve always been just a bit too much for you to handle.  In a dream world we’d still be living together – hopefully not in that shitty apartment – and we would have a new dog friend for Wubby and we’d be finishing up school and doing some seriously unrealistic planning regarding our lives together.  But we both know on a v personal level that the world isn’t perfect which is why the stars aligned for us again and our cards were pulled with five days left before I move 450 miles away.  Life is funny that way & I’ve always had shit luck so I guess running in to you and spending a few more darling moments together is the most fitting ending for our cliffhanger relationship, anyways.


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